How to let people know you're still recovering

A medical journey like an operation, treatment or injury can take its toll, both physically and emotionally. And it will take time before you’re back to your normal self.

When it comes to recovery, it’s important to move at your own pace. Sometimes, this means letting people know that you’re not quite ready to get back to things.

Talking about your recovery might be easy with some people and difficult with others. But it’s important to communicate your progress in a way that’s clear, respectful and firm.

People in your life may be curious about how you’re getting along. Letting them know about your progress can help them know you’re safe, happy and on the mend, and give them a better sense of where you stand.

Maintaining social connections while you recover isn’t just practical, either. Research indicates that social support during recovery can improve your healing outcomes.¹

At the same time, though, it’s important to set boundaries with other people when you’re recovering. Particularly when you need a little extra time off. This can help create clarity around what you can and can’t do (like returning to work), giving everyone involved more peace of mind.

Everybody’s recovery journey is different, and it’s important to move at your own pace. By giving yourself enough time to properly recuperate, you help yourself properly heal and prevent relapsed or prolonged pain (or other symptoms).

As you get to the later stages of your recovery, you might feel pressure from people around you to jump back into normal life. This might be work-people asking you to come back into the office, or it might be life-people inviting you out to dinner or a family get-together.

But you should never have to ‘push through’ or minimise your symptoms in order to meet other people’s expectations. This time is about you, and if you need to request a little more of it off, it’s important that you do.

Your loved ones might be eager to see you, and you may be eager to see them too! But you need to balance these expectations with your health. If you think that it’s not quite time to get back to your normal social routine, consider saying something like:

Chances are, your loved ones will understand and appreciate your recovery journey and honour your wishes. If they have trouble respecting your boundaries, though, or if there are children who don’t understand the situation, consider rephrasing the dialogue to something like:

You might also suggest different activities with loved ones, like watching a movie at home instead of going to a cinema, or eating a meal in instead of having one at a restaurant.

Letting work know that you need more time to recover can be tricky, particularly when your boss and colleagues are expecting you back. But it’s important that you don’t push yourself.

If you feel that a boss or colleague isn’t respecting your need for more time off, you might need to explore other channels, such as contacting HR. Often, workplaces have policies around time off, so understanding your rights will help clarify things.

Based on your treating team’s advice, you might tell them something like:

There may be workarounds to your work situation, too. This might include working from home for a short period or returning to a reduced schedule or workload for a few days or weeks.

You might also need to obtain a medical certificate, so make sure you speak with your workplace and treating team about this ahead of time.

Whenever your health is concerned, it’s important to be honest and upfront. This applies to people around you, and it applies to yourself.

Recovery is never a straight line, and you might not be recovering as quickly as you’d hoped. Make sure you monitor for signs like increased or unusual pain, fatigue, swelling or infection. And, if you’re concerned about anything, don’t just sit on it, report it to your treating team as soon as possible and be open to extending your recovery timeframe.

While getting back to normal life is another part of your recovery, it should never get in the way of it. Listen to your body and those taking care of you, and remember to cut yourself a little slack. Your body will thank you for it!

If you need urgent medical help and can’t get yourself to a hospital, or you feel your life is in immediate danger, call 000.